We have real-life, actual American Emma Thompson working at Podium HQ. When she mentioned she’d watched her first ever episode of the Great British Bake Off this week, we couldn’t resist getting her thoughts on the show that takes middle England by storm every autumn.

Can you summarise the Great British Bake Off for us, please?

So, basically, they assemble a group of people that perfectly represent everything that is Great Britain, stick them in a tent in the middle of nowhere with a ton of ovens, put them in aprons and then force them to bake ridiculously British desserts while people whisper dirty jokes to them…

Which is your favourite character?

In terms of the actual cast, I like the random host brunette presenter who dipped her biscuits in wine for the two minutes that she showed up for this (second) episode. Her other half just spends the whole time getting in people’s faces and basically fails at making things into innuendos… Why is she even there?

The bitchy old lady with the sour, tortoise face is pretty entertaining, though. Especially when she so innocently states that she likes eating carpet…

 

For the contestants, I can’t decide if I like sweet lil’ perfect British nan, Val, or the big black guy who just doesn’t give a crap.

How do you predict this season will pan out? Big season finale?

I feel like it wouldn’t be surprising if someone has a huge meltdown. It’s really hard to decide if I should laugh at the sheer Britishness of the whole situation or if I should cry along with these people when they are freaking out over the consistency of a biscuit…

What was your highlight of the show?

Well, the gingerbread PUB that the lady GREW UP IN was pretty British… especially because it included ‘sticky floors’ which is a phenomenon only true in proper, carpeted British pubs.

 

Lowlight: when I found out toward the end of the show that everyone had practised their signature biscuit. If you’ve baked something before successfully, why is it so difficult to get it right again just because someone’s hovering over you muttering dirty puns?

Is this the most British thing you’ve ever seen?

The sheer Britishness of how they describe baked goods… I don’t know if Americans who have never been to the UK could even comprehend how much people are actually like this, though!

When Blue Eyes threw the biscuit and proclaimed: “nice sound when it hits the plate!” Like, how can you be more English than APPRECIATING THE SOUND OF A BISCUIT HITTING A PLATE?!

His other fantastic lines got me, too: “I just hope and pray for a large enough cuppa tea to dip all these biscuits in.” When he describes the biscuits as “dinky,” and Mary agreed just because she wanted to say “dinky,” too. And the whole way they describe biting into the biscuit and the ‘biscuit experience’ as a whole…

It reminds me of multiple conversations I’ve observed in awe in the office: describing the perfect order at Nando’s, including the best amount of chicken, the proper sauce choice, and the deliciousness of the sides – and how to pair it all…This went on for about half an hour. They weren’t even going to Nando’s, just discussing it.

Or when someone corrects someone else regarding the ‘right’ way to enjoy ‘your favourite way’ to eat a certain type of cake…

So, yes, most British thing ever.

Do you think Hollywood (the place, not Paul) would be interested in the movie rights?

It would have to be a parody of the British culture.

Wait, is that the joke?

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